Bad Things Happen in Threes

Remember that I said bad things come in threes. Well, I am scared. But the good news first. My USGA Handicap Index is 11.9 because of the 87 I shot at Southern Dunes! I am afraid that I may have some work to do to keep it this low for awhile. The USGA Handicap Index is based on the best 10 of your last 20 scores, modified for course difficulty. Four of the next five rounds that burn off of my handicap were included in my 10 best scores.

This past weekend Chad Feldheimer honored me with his presence on the golf course. The temperature was supposed to be below 100 degrees so, after much whining and complaining, he "manned up" and decided to play. We played the Stadium Course at the TPC Scottsdale, the home of the "greatest show on grass", the Waste Management Phoenix Open. This is the PGA tournament that brought you one of the most controversial rules decisions in golf history. See link and go to "Windows Media Player". The tournament is best known for the short par-5 15th hole with the island green, the par-3 16th hole, the rowdiest hole in golf (who can forget Tiger Woods's hole-in-one!), and the drivable par-4 17th hole. It is a birdie fest for the pros and they can shoot 5 under par for that 3-hole stretch. Chad had only played the TPC Scottsdale on his Tiger Woods golf video game so he was excited to play the real thing. The greens fee to play the TPC Scottsdale was about $50 (it is about $250 in season), which is on the high end for me. The fairways were not in great condition and the rough was pretty heavy, but the greens were immaculate. They were fast and rolled true and if you hit your approach shot high, it would hold the green.

The golf course plays to a par-71 over 7,200 for the pros with a course rating of 74.6 and a slope rating of 138. We played from the Championship Tees, which are 6,525 yards with a course rating of 71.1 and a slope rating of 129. That was plenty for me. I shot a 91 and was only one over par on the four par-3 holes, but 5 over par on the 3 par-5 holes. Chad started off with five straight bogeys and if we were closer to the clubhouse I think he would have quit. Then he righted the ship and was one over par for the last 13 holes for a 77. On the short par-5 15th hole with the island green, Chad decided to move back one tee box and play from about 500 yards. I stayed at the 468 yard tee box. Our tee shot were both right down the middle but I outdrove him by about one foot (give or take the 30 yard head start) and we were both 200 yards from the flagstick and 170 yards from the front of the green. I stubbed my 3-hybrid and rolled it short of the water and Chad hit a 6-iron that did not draw and landed in the water. He made his up-and-down for a par, but I chunked my next shot into the bunker and made a 7! On the par-3 16th hole with the stadium crowd going wild (not really) we both hit the green and made our pars and walked off glad that the crowd could not jeer us. Chad drove past the green on No. 17 with some help from the cart path, chipped onto the green and made a birdie 3.

But getting back to the real story, bad things happen in threes. On the par-4 11th hole, Chad and I both hit good drives. One of our playing partners duffed his drive. Because we were playing "ready golf" I drove the cart out to our ball and moved far into the right rough area waiting for the person behind us to hit. Chad was in the cart texting (or sexting) and I was standing beside the cart not watching the shot (my bad). All of a sudden we hear "fore" and I cover my head with my arms and our playing partner's golf ball screams by my head and hits the plastic on the edge of the top of the cart and bounces backwards 25+ yards. There is no question in my mind that if that ball hit me in the head I was a dead man! I have now had two close calls and bad things happen in threes. I am scared!